The Race of the Trojan Horses

In the race of the Trojan horses, we have entered, it would seem, the final stretch.

Those of us with eyes to see and optical nerves still communicating with the brain - our voices drowned out in the hysteria - have a decision to make: continue languishing in the grandstand, or make some fast money.

We recommend the latter!

And so we provide our analysis by which you might inform your wager. Which Trojan horse will be the first to bring about the final end of Western Civilization?

Tommy-Boy Tolerance – American President Obama’s call for defense cuts , days after the International Institute for Strategic Studies’ most recent report that Iran may have enough low-enriched uranium by the end of 2010 to build a nuclear bomb, have vastly improved this steed’s standing in the match. The action validates in no uncertain terms the United States’ renewed commitment as a staunch ally in Europe’s Tolerance Above All suicide pact.

Compassion Candy – Hot on Tommy Boy’s heels is Compassion Candy! 40 years of Marxist-conditioning are paying off as the U.S. Congress prepares to impoverish the *world’s strongest economy via the purchase of $825 billion worth of political pornography while convincing they American people they do so in the interest of “the common good.”

*(as of 30 January 2009 noon-ish)

Stewardship Sue – Record cold temperatures and snow accumulations can’t stop this one! With the weight of the world on her shoulders (and the fire of the Apocalypse in her heart) Stewardship Sue is the long-shot winner in this race, promising to devastate the American (ergo – the world’s) economy through iron-fisted control of the world’s resources, processed and distributed according to the dictates of The Unicorn’s Book of Sparkle Flowers … that is… global climate change policy.

Ladies and gentlemen, place your bets. The race is on. The end is near. Good luck!

Cheers,

Charlie