The Seven Habits of Highly Unsuccessful Continents (Part 1)

Consider if you will two continents, side by side. One a bedazzling testament to the unprecedented peace and prosperity resultant of dogged adherence to the Rule of Law and the principles of free market economy, the other an increasingly vast cesspit of violence, poverty, and human misery. We refer,of course, in this instance to the Americas. The latter, South and Central America – “Latin” America to its friends; the former, North America. (Dare we call it, “Anglo?”)

One wonders at the cause of such disparity. Uneven distribution of natural resources? No. Unfair trade practices? Not if we are to accept the current fashion in Leftist rhetoric: “… major corporations are downsizing their American workforce and at the same time exporting jobs into Mexico, Latin America, Taiwan, China, India, Russia and other parts of the world.” Is it diet? Potentially, but unlikely. It is – as with the overwhelming majority of today’s global ills – that human compulsion to embrace complete and total stupidity. Invariably this results in the practice of really bad habits which bring about all manner of the violence, poverty, and human misery noted above.

Highly Unsuccessful Habit 1: Tyranny.

The Heritage Foundation reports:
“On January 31, the Venezuelan National Assembly unanimously 'voted' to hand absolute power over to Hugo Chavez by granting him the ability to rule by decree for the next 18 months. Shouts of "Fatherland, Socialism or Death…We will prevail!" rose from the crowd of Chavista legislators and supporters.”

Evidently what makes Mr. Chavez so irresistible to “voters” – other than the barrel of a gun – are his claims to have been passed the torch from those past champions of Latin American greatness - Marti, Bolivar, and Castro - to achieve the as yet unachieved goals (196 years and counting) of the Bolivarian Revolution: the unification of Latin America and the Caribbean as a counterbalance to U.S. hegemony.

How will he achieve this? Continued railing against the evils of the U.S. and free markets (see “unprecedented peace and prosperity” above), while preaching the glories of socialism to the utterly desperate and gullible legions of Latin American poor.

This is, in a word, “stupid.” And those who support such stupidity, more so.

Highly Unsuccessful Habit 2: Socialism
As Sir Winston once so eloquently opined, “Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy; its inherent value is the equal sharing of misery.” One need only glimpse any history of the 20th century (or France) to see the validity of His charge: robust unemployment, devastated economies, and governments forced ultimately to resort to torture and tanks on their own people in order to enforce their collectivist policies.

Highly Unsuccessful Habit 3: Lack of Punctuality
In today’s world of cultural sensitivity we are told we must respect a people’s ways even when those ways are manifestly idiotic and destructive. In Latin America, one such practice is referred to as Mañana, meaning "tomorrow," an age-old euphemism for the lateness and procrastination that are common in Latin America. This “alternative interpretation of time” is considered part of Latin American culture and something we all must recognize and honor. Not bloody likely. Fortunately, the Peruvian government is attempting to coax its population out of Siesta and into the space-time continuum through its "Time without Delay” initiative.

In some parts of the world – coincidentally those where violence, poverty, and human misery are not the order of the day – citizens learn such fundamentals as THE IMPORTANCE OF SHOWING UP ON TIME when they are children, from their parents and teachers. In Latin America, it is left to government.

But not to worry, Lord Chavez will fix that, as he will fix all the ills plaguing the Latin American people, even if he has to execute every last one of them to do it.

Next in our series: Africa and Indonesia.

Cheers,

Charlie